The Fat Elevator Protest


My daughter is graduating college in May. I am so proud of her. I knew at birth, she would do something special. She was so aware of her surroundings when she was born. I remember going to see her where they hold all the new born babies. When I got to the baby viewing window, there was a crowd of people looking into the window and pointing. What could be so amazing with new babies? My daughter. My daughter was 9 lbs. when she was born. She could hold her head up by herself. She had a strong neck. When I looked into the baby viewing window, she was on her stomach, lifting her head up over the little bed looking at the other babies. It looked so weird. She never cried much as a newborn. All she wanted was me or her Dad to hold her up so she could see. She hated the car seat because she wanted to see everything. As a college graduate I know she will see everything and do everything.

My daughter did everything fast. She talked fast, she walked fast and she was so aware. I remember telling her Dad not to curse in front of her, but he did. Some people do not understand that babies pick up everything you say and do. They are like sponges. Chelsea was about 8 months and we were waiting for an elevator to go down to the parking garage. When the elevator doors opened it was full of people. We had to wait. When she saw all those people, she said in a loud cute baby girl voice, “Aw Shit!” The people in the elevator laughed as the doors closed. No! No! little girl.  It was too funny, especially since now she does not believe in using curse words.

Speaking of elevators,I do have a funny about me in an elevator. This was about three years ago. I was leaving from my doctor’s office and needed to catch the elevator going down. When the elevator arrived and opened it was semi- full, but I was in a hurry. I saw a small space to the side. When I got ready to get on the elevator, everyone looked at me as if I was making a mistake. I dont think they wanted me to get on. It was not that full and I was in a hurry, so I squeezed into the small space.

We were on the 10th floor. Suddenly, the elevator stopped on the fifth floor. We were stuck! Why did everyone look at me. I heard one man say, I knew it! You know I had that black woman attitude look on my face. Was he talking to me?  I pointed at the sign that said maximum 2000 pounds. “There is not 2000 pounds in this elevator.” I said sarcastically. The sighing man said “Yeah, not on this side of the elevator.” Next, a lady said maybe we need to even the elevator out. “People, there is not 2000 pounds in this elevator!” I was thinking to myself that all I need is one more indication about me being the weight problem and I will…Suddenly, a man standing behind me said, “Everyone needs to shut their mouth because you are taking up all the air. I am not that fat, but big mouths are sucking up all the air.” I looked around and noticed he was taller and bigger than me. I did not notice him when I got on the elevator because I was trying to squeeze in at the front. Oh, they were not talking to me. I guess, I will be quiet. Wrong! The same sighing man told the other man, “Maybe fat people should take the stairs for exercise.” They started arguing in that elevator. Now, it was funny and if you know me, I will make a joke. I started chanting “NO JUSTICE FOR FAT PEOPLE!” There were two college looking boys on the elevator and they started chanting with me. The lady next to me started chanting. We were so loud, the two men stopped arguing. We all laughed. After about five minutes, the elevator started.

When we got to the bottom, some maintenance men were there and ask if we were all right. We all laughed and went on about our business. It was probably the first  elevator fat protest in history. LOL


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