The Fat Elevator Protest

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My daughter is graduating college in May. I am so proud of her. I knew at birth, she would do something special. She was so aware of her surroundings when she was born. I remember going to see her where they hold all the new born babies. When I got to the baby viewing window, there was a crowd of people looking into the window and pointing. What could be so amazing with new babies? My daughter. My daughter was 9 lbs. when she was born. She could hold her head up by herself. She had a strong neck. When I looked into the baby viewing window, she was on her stomach, lifting her head up over the little bed looking at the other babies. It looked so weird. She never cried much as a newborn. All she wanted was me or her Dad to hold her up so she could see. She hated the car seat because she wanted to see everything. As a college graduate I know she will see everything and do everything.

My daughter did everything fast. She talked fast, she walked fast and she was so aware. I remember telling her Dad not to curse in front of her, but he did. Some people do not understand that babies pick up everything you say and do. They are like sponges. Chelsea was about 8 months and we were waiting for an elevator to go down to the parking garage. When the elevator doors opened it was full of people. We had to wait. When she saw all those people, she said in a loud cute baby girl voice, “Aw Shit!” The people in the elevator laughed as the doors closed. No! No! little girl.  It was too funny, especially since now she does not believe in using curse words.

Speaking of elevators,I do have a funny about me in an elevator. This was about three years ago. I was leaving from my doctor’s office and needed to catch the elevator going down. When the elevator arrived and opened it was semi- full, but I was in a hurry. I saw a small space to the side. When I got ready to get on the elevator, everyone looked at me as if I was making a mistake. I dont think they wanted me to get on. It was not that full and I was in a hurry, so I squeezed into the small space.

We were on the 10th floor. Suddenly, the elevator stopped on the fifth floor. We were stuck! Why did everyone look at me. I heard one man say, I knew it! You know I had that black woman attitude look on my face. Was he talking to me?  I pointed at the sign that said maximum 2000 pounds. “There is not 2000 pounds in this elevator.” I said sarcastically. The sighing man said “Yeah, not on this side of the elevator.” Next, a lady said maybe we need to even the elevator out. “People, there is not 2000 pounds in this elevator!” I was thinking to myself that all I need is one more indication about me being the weight problem and I will…Suddenly, a man standing behind me said, “Everyone needs to shut their mouth because you are taking up all the air. I am not that fat, but big mouths are sucking up all the air.” I looked around and noticed he was taller and bigger than me. I did not notice him when I got on the elevator because I was trying to squeeze in at the front. Oh, they were not talking to me. I guess, I will be quiet. Wrong! The same sighing man told the other man, “Maybe fat people should take the stairs for exercise.” They started arguing in that elevator. Now, it was funny and if you know me, I will make a joke. I started chanting “NO JUSTICE FOR FAT PEOPLE!” There were two college looking boys on the elevator and they started chanting with me. The lady next to me started chanting. We were so loud, the two men stopped arguing. We all laughed. After about five minutes, the elevator started.

When we got to the bottom, some maintenance men were there and ask if we were all right. We all laughed and went on about our business. It was probably the first  elevator fat protest in history. LOL

I hate Schlitterbahn!

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We are off again because of a cold day. This is amazing for Texas, but as a teacher I say Woo Hoo! Parents need time with their wonderful children. LOL   I actually had a veggie sandwich today. It was good. It is like when you don’t have enough meat on the sandwich, but you have all the other things. It was good. There are a lot of good vegetarian meals. Try them! you will like them. Try them Sam I am! A little Dr. Seuss joke. No? Oh well.

People keep saying my kids must understand my humor because they put up with my crazy adventures. I guess they had no choice. I kept them so close and sheltered early on. Also, I was very involved in all their activities. We did have a lot of fun. When we went places, I called it “In the Wind.” This means I don’t know what we are doing that day, but we are in the wind. We were going anywhere and everywhere.

Having kids is so special, but all parents worry. I think when they are little you worry more about them getting sick, somebody bothering them or loosing them through sickness or kidnapping, etc.  I lost my son once. It was at that horrible water park Schliterbahn in New Braunfels. I say horrible because it is one of those places that kids get lost easily.

In the summer, my kids use to spend time at a Park in the Park’s and Recreation summer program. It was like a free camp. I was off in the summer, so I would volunteer my time. I became close with the staff and the kids. It was so much fun. We decided to take a group of kids to Schlitterbahn. At that time my kids were 8 and 9. The adults decided to split the kids by some adults going with a group of kids to the big water rides and some adults staying with the little kids at the slower rides. You know I was the one that volunteered for the slower rides. It was hot and a lot of walking, so the little kids were great for me and my fat. LOL

There was a big pool in the kids area that the kids could go around and around using floats. I sat a beach chair in the shallow part of the water and watched them go around. We had a good time, until I did not see my son. I saw all the other kids, but not my son. I called my daughter over to me and asked her where is her brother. She had not seen him. OMG! Panic began to rise up in my body. Where was my baby? All kinds of things came into my mind. I got up and went around in the water myself. We looked everywhere and no son! I wanted to faint. It was like being in a nightmare. Wake me up?  Finally, I saw my son. He was running toward me. I hugged and kissed my baby. “Where have you been?”” I wanted to ride the big water slide and it had a long line.” The fear of loosing him had left my body. Now, anger was rising up.

After fussing at my son, I explained to him about never leaving the group without permission. After that day, I made up the term, “My right leg.” I told my son, if he cant see my right leg then he is too far. I dont know why I chose the right leg. I guess because I am right handed and do everything to the right first. I dont know. It worked.From the time my kids were old enough to go places with or without me, they knew they were a package and they needed to keep up with each other. My daughter hated it  because my son was always getting in trouble. My son hated it because my daughter was always telling on him. It was good for awhile, but now she thinks she is the boss of my son. Poor boy!

Keep fit my peeps! Keep up with your children and remind them of the rules when they are out in a public area.

 

Run Son! Run!

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I lost two pounds! I am so happy. It had been awhile. I had to make some adjustments on my diet. I am following my nutritionist, but I had to tweak a few things. I have to learn to make my dinners more exciting. I can make it through the day, but if my dinner is boring, I will cheat. I am finding some good quick recipes. So it is all good! Celebrating the two pounds! LOL

I am not a animal person. I like dogs. Notice, I said like. I prefer small dogs. Fish are ok. Cats and me do not match. I hate them. I am a cat racist. If they stay in their world and leave me in my world, we can exist together. LOL

My son always wanted a dog, but I would not buy it. I did not want to take care of it, and the way he kept his room, I knew he would not take care of it. My poor son. He use to watch those late night commercials about those pitiful dogs and get sad. My daughter likes to joke and say she saw him rocking in his room singing, “In the Arms of an Angel” to one of those commercials. He said she is lying. Poor child!

The next few post, I will dedicate to my kids. They have put up with a lot from me. Being a single Mom is not easy, but I tried to make sure they had the best childhood. We did not always have enough money, but I made sure they had fun activities, friends and good schools.  I moved a lot so they could live in safe and clean neighborhoods and be zoned to good schools. It was the least I could do. They both are in college now, so I guess it is all good. All I can do now is pray that they have productive lives. I definitely want them to have a much better life than what I gave them.

This is not a funny story. It is more of a OMG! What a horrible Mother story. I dedicate it to my Son. He always has his Mom’s back! One night, we were leaving from my parents house. My kids were about 10 and 11. We were singing songs on the way home. We lived in Stafford. We were about 15 minutes from home, when the car started making a noise and stopped on main or Highway 90 going toward Stafford. If you know where I am talking about, it is a very dark road. I pulled over and tried to start the car. It would not start. I looked at the gas gauge and realized I was out of gas. Dang it! I forgot to put gas in the car. I knew when I went to my Parents that I was going to need gas, but I forgot. Dumb! Dumb! Dumb! What to do? It was dark! I had my kids and the nearest gas station was about 15 blocks down the road. I could see it. It was the only thing I could see.

I could get out and walk to the gas station, but I was too fat and too slow. Plus, I could not leave my kids in the car. I could not take them with me for the same reasons. I was in a dilemma. We did not have cell phones back then. Yes, people had them, but I did not have one that worked. It was a pay as you go phone and I had not paid it. A car pulled up behind us because I noticed we were in a turning area. I was scared because the people could be robbers or killers or OMG! The man got out the car. I could see that it was two men. Young men. I told the kids to be quiet and if anything happens, we will fight to the death. We had codes back then that meant different things like look out for people walking up to the car, run, my daughter is in a bad mood. LOL

You would think my kids would be scared siting on that dark road with no gas. They were not! They always felt that I could take care of everything. If only they knew. I always had to be strong. Sometimes, I really wanted to scream HELP ME! I never did, but sometimes late at night, I prayed to God for help. Thank you Jesus!

The man got out and asked if I needed help. I told him no. “My husband is on the way.” I probably should have told him the problem, but I was scared. If they knew I was stranded, they might of helped, but they might of saw an opportunity to hurt us or kill us. The man got back in his car and left. OK! It was time to think of what to do. We could wait until daylight, but it was only 10:00pm. We could not sit there that long. I made a horrible decision that will bother me the rest of my life.

My son was a fast runner from playing little league football. In fact, he had on his football cleats and football pants with the pads.  I told him that he was going to have to run down main street to the gas station and get a gas can. Fill the can with gas and bring it back to the car. Many kids his age would of said no. My son quickly said okay! My daughter wanted to do it, but she was a girl and she did not run as fast as my son. She does not agree. I knew better. I hoped.

I told my son to stay close to the grass, but don’t get in the grass. There might be snakes or any type of animal in that high grass. I told him to run fast, watch for cars and to not stop running until he gets to the gas station. OMG! I kissed my son and let him out of the car. I wanted to cry, but once again, I had to be strong for my kids. I gave him $10. It is all I had. I told him to tell the gas station attendee the problem.  I would pay for the can when I reached the station. I am sure he would believe a little Kid. Right? “I Love you Son!”

My daughter and I watched my son run toward the gas station. I kept thinking horrible thoughts. What if he got ran over by a car? What if someone stopped and kidnapped my baby? What if a animal got him? What if….OMG! It seemed as if it took forever. I saw him reach the gas station. Sweet relief! No! Now he had to run back. I held my breath again as I thought the same horrible thoughts. He made it back. It was all God! Thank you again Jesus! My son put the gas in the car and I was able to make it to the gas station and eventually home. My kids and I talked about it all night. We laughed, but I wanted to cry. I told them we could never tell anyone. I always thought being a single parent that if I messed up, they would take my kids from me. This would be a good reason. Not really, but I was young. My kids never told anyone about that horrible adventure. In fact, this is the first time I told anyone.

Later that night, I prayed and cried to the only one who knows my pain and what I have had to struggle through. He has brought me this far and will continue to bring me further. In the name of Jesus, Amen!

Thank you son! I guess I should of got him that puppy.

Keep it healthy peeps! Keep your kids close and God closer!

Ratted Out!

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It is sooooooooooooo cold in Houston. You know us southern girls do not like  cold weather. I know it is much colder in places like New York, but we feel like it is about that cold. I usually joke by saying it is the season for us big and beautiful girls. Men want someone they can snuggle up to and be warm. We are looking good right now! LOL.

I am doing a lot of research right now on foods and how they work on the body. My diet with the nutritionist is going ok, but it is getting boring. There are so many different ways out there, so if you know some good strategies, let me know. Also some good recipes. I have never been the chicken breast person unless it is very tender. It is a lifestyle change, but it does not have to be boring. Fit Foods that I talked about has some tasty foods, but they are too expensive. I will get the hang of it. I have know choice. It is my life.

Today was a horrible day at the school that I work at because I saw a rat! Yes, I said a rat! Now, I know buildings can have rats, but I dont want to see it. The building I am in is only two years old and very clean, so I was not expecting it. I was standing in the hallway waiting on my class and I thought I saw something small coming down the hallway. My eyes could not believe it. I blinked and saw it was a small rat running down the hallway toward my way. It turned into the classroom across from me and went under the door. The thing they say about rats not having bones is true. It went under the smallest space. Yuck!!!!

OMG! I panicked and started knocking on doors. By this time all the kids were coming into the hallway. I was panicking and saying there is a rat. Here is the horrible part. Everyone was looking at me and laughing. What is wrong with you people? We need to clear the school! Call the exterminators! Do something.! Everyone was looking at me. I thought at least the girls would be scared along with me, but they were not. The class that the rat ran into, did not move. The teacher was upset, but the kids…NOTHING! Did I dream it? Did I lose my mind?

I started my class and put a student who sits near the door on Rat Watch! I told them that Ms. Taylor will not be able to save them. If the rat comes in, get out of my way. I am a big girl and I will knock you over. LOL They laughed. The assistant principal came in and he was laughing. I said there is a rat! “I know. We were watching you on camera and you are so entertaining.” WTH? It is not funny and they better not show that tape at the next faculty meeting.

Most of my students live across the street in some low income apartments. Apparently, they have seen rats. Apparently they have seen them at the school. I dont need to see them. I guess I will be looking for another job. LOL

At the previous school that I worked at, they built a new school. Before they built the new school, we were in a old building that had been there for over thirty years. Talk about rats. They had rats big as cats. Yuck! Some teachers would have to clean poop up every morning. Rats would fall though the ceiling if the tiles were missing and they would get caught in the AC and die. The smell was horrible! Well, one day after school, some teachers and I were talking in another teachers room. There were about five of us. I noticed that one teacher had stopped talking and was staring across the room at the windows. I asked her what was wrong. She pointed at the windows. Ladies and gentleman, I saw the biggest rat I ever saw crossing the room on the windowsill. I grabbed my purse and started running toward the door. Here is the problem. Another teacher who was as big as me started running toward the door. When we got to the door, we both tried to go through it and became stuck. Oh my! It was like one of those old three stooges movies. We tried to push through until we finally got loose. Both our big tails ran down the hall. You should of saw people moving out the way. It was like two eighteen wheelers speeding down the highway. Big people have a hard time running, but that day I was a track star.

You know when I go back to work, I will probably walk down the hallway and into my classroom like I am in a scary movie. It is scary! They never found the rat. One of the guys said it is probably hiding in the file cabinet until people leave. All I will say is if it comes anywhere near me or I open a file cabinet in my room and something jumps out, get the defibrillator or get the hell out my way because I am on my way to my car and I am going home!!!!  I wonder how much I can get on unemployment? LOL

 

Keep it healthy my peeps. Keep away rodents!

Lake Michelle

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Trying to drink 8 glasses of water a day is a chore. Who knew? I love water, but I am not that thirsty. With diabetes, you do get thirsty, but when everything is going right, you don’t fill as thirsty. My sugar readings have been good and dieting is helping, so I am not as thirsty. Today, I forced water down my throat. You would of swore it was medicine. I have to do it, so drink, drink, drink! LOL

Speaking of water. I love to take showers. They are refreshing and quick. However, sometimes it is good to soak in the tub. It is good, but not always the best for fat me. The first time, I realize soaking in the tub was a problem, was a few years ago when I gained more weight. I was getting into the tub and noticed, I could not sit down as easily as others. It is like trying to sit on the floor. It is a process. I could not slowly lower myself into the tub. I had to plop down into the tub. Good! No! Water is in the tub. When I plopped down, all the water shot up and out the side of the tub. OMG! It was like the Brazos river running through my restroom. I had to laugh, but I had to clean it up. This is when I notice another problem, GETTING OUT OF THE TUB! Of course, I cannot get up like most people by pulling myself straight up from the sitting position. I tried, but no luck. Instead, I had to turn over onto my hands and knees and then pull using the soap handle. Good! Wrong! Turning over made more water shoot out into the new Michelle River.

Well at least I can get out now. WRONG! I dont know what they use to attach the soap handle thingy, but apparently it is not strong enough to hold my beauty. Yes, it broke when I tried to lift up. Yes, I fell back into the tub, and yes more water went out into my The Michelle River. What a site! LOL.

By the time, I got out of the tub, I was standing in Lake Michelle. Horrible! Now, when I want to soak in the tub, I put than a million towels. I run the water after I get in and let it out before I get out. HORRIBLE!

Keep it fit my Peeps! Showers rule! LOL

Mall Fat

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WHY IS FIT FOODS SO EXPENSIVE? I do not understand why healthy food is so expensive. You are getting less, so the price should be less. The thing about Fit Foods is it is too portioned. Talk about being hungry. The crazy part is people are lined up to get the food and there are people that go weekly. Fit Foods will make you realize that cooking your own food is best. The sad part is busy people need a good healthy quick pick up food. However, Fit Foods is too expensive for regular folk. My daughter has become good at cooking healthy food, and portioning  the food out into containers. Maybe she needs to start a business, whereas she fixes good healthy food for less. The average folk is where most of the obesity is running rapid. The people I saw in Fit Foods were a size 2. LOL If you know where to get reasonable already made healthy food, let me know.

This is a very recent story. I have sciatica that is brought on by my weight, therefore, I cannot walk a long way without my back hurting. If I walk and ignore the pain, I cannot walk at all, so when the pain comes on, I sit down for a few minutes and then I walk again. It does not affect me at the grocery store or on the treadmill because I am holding onto something that helps hold my weight. I try to know how far I must walk and wear the right shoes. Ugly shoes. (Another good reason to lose weight. lol)  I know what to do now, but a few years ago, I would not go places that I had to walk or stand too long. People thought I was being lazy, but it was my back.

Anyway, I needed to get some vitamins that my nutritionist recommended and the only store that had this certain brand was the Vitamin World. It is not any vitamin store. The closest Vitamin World to me is in First Colony Mall. You know my first reaction was, NOT THE MALL! However, I was smart. I called  Vitamin World and asked the guy which way is the best way to come in near the Vitamin Store. If I come in the right way, I will not have to walk much. The guy told me to come in between the two JC Penney’s. Ok! Wrong!

When I got to the mall, I saw the two JC Penney’s. There was no way that I saw to go in between the two JC Penney’s from the outside.  I saw where I could go in next to JC Penney and probably walk down a little bit. WRONG! It looks different from the outside. Duh!  My silly tail went in through the food court. Bad idea for the fat and hungry.  When you are trying to eat healthy, the food court is the wrong entrance to go trough. Why was there people standing with samples of food? GOOD SMELLING FOOD! I passed three guys with food samples. Good Michelle. No! The fourth guy had tiny pieces of a Philly cheese steak sandwich. I had to taste it. OMG! I think I tasted heaven. After eating healthy, low sodium, low everything food, this salty, fatty, tasty piece of good food melted in my mouth. I wanted to steal the tray, take off running and devour the entire tray. However, I cant run fast enough. LOL I kept walking.

When I got to the end of the food court, I looked to the right and I saw JC Penney. Why was it a whole 90 blocks down the corridor? I parked in the wrong spot. Too late. I was there and I was on a mission. Maybe it would not be so bad. WRONG! It was like crossing Texas. When I arrived at the first JC Penney, I did not see Vitamin World. Of course it was near the other JC Penney. The other JC Penney was not next to the first JC Penney. It was miles away in my mind. MORE WALKING! My back was killing me, but I made it to Vitamin World. I had to sit down first. There was a bench in front of the store. Unfortunately, there were two college looking girls sitting on it. I was in such pain, I decided to go stand by the bench. I am sure when they see me, they will be polite and get up. Wrong! They sat there talking. I really needed them to move, so I started breathing hard and coughing. I said excuse me and tried to sit in the little space next to one of the girls. They looked at me and quickly moved. I know it was wrong, but I was in pain. LOL

I sat for about five minutes. I went into the Vitamin World and found everything I needed. Now it was time to make that long walk across Texas back to my car. Usually, walking back is not so bad because I know where I am going. I thought I knew where I was going. After walking for a while, I did not see the food court. Where is it? Did they move it? Is this a cruel joke on fat people? I saw the end of the mall. I dont remember what store it was, but there was no food court. I turned around and began walking back toward the JC Penney that I did not see. Was I in so much pain that I was delusional? I saw a sign that said Food Court with an arrow. I think I turned wrong. I began walking the direction of the arrow. OMG! No food court! Where am I? I had to sit and think this through. I sat down with a old man. He looked about 80. We began talking about his grand kids, the mall, the weather. It was nice, but I realized time was passing and I did not know where I was. I said goodbye to the old man and continued my journey.

By this time, I figured there was never a food court and I was in a dream. WAKE UP MICHELLE! It was no dream. Finally, I asked one of the workers who was in the middle of the mall selling jewelry or something.  She pointed to a little hallway that led to the restroom, but it also led to the food court. I was so excited. It was like the yellow brick road to OZ. I knew at the end of the road, I could go home. “There’s no place like home.” There’s no place like home.”   I followed the hall and ended up at the end of the food court. I went out the door and got into my car. Sweet relief!

It is a shame. This was another great reason for me to lose weight. Plus, I felt like the 80 year old man. Although, he could walk better than I. I am on a mission to lose the weight and be able to walk the entire mall without sitting down. I will conquer the beast. LOL

Keep it fit peeps.  Keep a map! LOL

 

Dog Gone Fat!

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It is almost MLK Day. I think of the struggle that Martin Luther King Jr. and others went through to insure equal rights. I am grateful to all who put their lives  on the line to ensure freedom for all. However there is much to do in many minority neighborhoods. One thing that is somewhat minor that I have a problem with is DOGS! I love dogs, but I do not like stray dogs. For some reason many Hispanic and Black neighborhoods have stray dogs. It is as if, once people cannot take care of them, they let them go on the street. Horrible!  Some of the dogs are dangerous and for a fat person like me it is not good. I can run a little, but I cannot jump or climb or whatever it takes to get away from the dog. Maybe I need to have a march on not letting your dangerous dogs loose. “Say it Loud. Stop Stray Dogs!”

The funny story today is not about me, but my fat was part of the problem. My daughter plays the piano. She went to a school in elementary that had a focus on music. One of her classes was piano. In fifth grade, she had a difficult piece to learn, so I hired a private tutor to help. In fifth grade, my daughter was short and a bit chubby. She was not fat, but had a little more weight on her butt and thighs. The piano tutor was the aunt of a friend of mine and she lived in a neighborhood not to far from where we lived. The neighborhood was diverse, so I did not worry to much about dogs, but I am always on the lookout.

After piano lessons, my son and I were sitting outside in the van. I drove a mini van back in those days. My daughter came out of the house, and that is when I saw it. A big white dog coming down the sidewalk. It was almost a block away, but it started running when it saw my daughter. We did not have much time. I told my daughter to run. She saw the dog and started running toward the car. My son began yelling run! Here is where my fat comes in to being a problem. Most people would have opened the door and got out to help their child, but I knew it takes me forever to get out of the car and get in, so this would not help. The dog was coming and coming fast.  I decided to roll the window down and have my daughter climb into my window and across me. There was no time for her to run around to the other side of the van. She threw her books in and started climbing in the window. She tried to go across me, but my fat and the steering wheel was in the way. She was stuck. Her feet and butt were dangling out the window. Her brother who was in fourth grade at the time, jumped in the front and tried to pull her through the window, but the dog was almost at the car. The only thing I could do is drive. I started the car and drove with my daughter’s legs dangling out the window. We drove down the street and around about two corners. I could see people pointing at us. I am sure it looked strange. We stopped and my daughter was able to scoot into the window and go over to the passenger seat. It was horrible. We looked at each other and started laughing.

My poor child. However, my kids are use to me and my fat. It is a good thing, but also a pitiful thing. I thank my children for putting up with my silliness and my fat. For them and myself, I am working hard to lose this weight.

Keep it free my Peeps. DOG FREE! LOL